Free AI Coding Tool From China? Hold My Bourbon While I Explain Why This Matters

Christ, my head is pounding. I’d barely finished my morning coffee (splash of whiskey, hair of the dog) when this beauty landed in my inbox. Alibaba - you know, China’s answer to Amazon if Amazon was on steroids - just dropped a nuclear bomb in the coding world. And the best part? It’s free. Yeah, you heard that right. Free like that questionable hot dog spinning on the roller at the gas station at 3 AM.

Google's Research Chief Wants You To Keep Coding (While AI Eats Your Lunch)

Another morning, another tech executive telling us plebs how to live our lives. This time it’s Google’s head of research Yossi Matias, spouting wisdom between sips of whatever overpriced cold brew they serve in their Chelsea office. The message? “Everyone should learn to code!” Sure, buddy. Pour me another bourbon while I break this down.

Here’s the deal: Matias is pushing the same tired “learn to code” mantra that’s been floating around since I was still sober enough to remember my passwords. But here’s what’s rich - he’s doing it while his own CEO admits that 25% of their code is now written by AI. That’s like a bartender telling you to learn mixology while installing self-serving beer taps.