Jan. 16, 2025
Listen, I just caught my neighbor’s kid using ChatGPT to write a poem about the futility of existence. Kid’s thirteen. When I was thirteen, the deepest thing I wrote was my name in the snow, if you catch my drift. Times change, I guess. Here I am, three fingers of bourbon in, trying to make sense of this brave new world where machines write our homework.
According to some fresh numbers from Pew Research (which I’m reading through whiskey-blurred vision), about 26% of teens are now using ChatGPT for their schoolwork. That’s doubled since their last count, which reminds me - I should probably double this drink.
Jan. 15, 2025
Look, I’ve been staring at this “Economic Blueprint” from OpenAI for the past three hours, nursing my fourth bourbon, and I gotta tell you - these guys make my neighborhood fortune teller look like a pessimist. They’re out here promising to revolutionize American education faster than I can find my car keys in the morning.
Here’s the deal: OpenAI just dropped their master plan for turning American education into some kind of digital wonderland, conveniently timed with Trump’s potential comeback tour. Because nothing says “trust us with your kids’ future” like launching your grand vision during peak political chaos, right?
Dec. 21, 2024
Listen, I’m three bourbons deep into what was supposed to be a quiet Saturday morning when this gem of a news story slides across my desk like a wet bar napkin. Arizona - you beautiful disaster - has just approved a school where AI does the teaching. Not as a helper, not as a tool, but as the whole damn show.
Let that sink in while I pour another drink.
Dec. 16, 2024
I’m nursing the mother of all hangovers this morning, which seems appropriate given the dystopian nightmare I’m about to share with you. Pour yourself something strong - you’re gonna need it.
Remember when the worst thing that could happen in college was getting caught passing notes or having your roommate walk in at an awkward moment? Those were the good old days, friends. Now we’ve got AI detection software acting like some digital Spanish Inquisition, with professors playing amateur detective and students ratting each other out like it’s 1984 with a WiFi connection.
Dec. 12, 2024
Look, I wasn’t planning on writing today. My head’s still pounding from last night’s exploration of Kentucky’s finest exports, but this story sobered me up faster than my morning coffee-and-bourbon combo.
UCLA, that bastion of higher learning where parents send their kids for the bargain price of their life savings, has decided to let AI teach medieval literature. Not as a supplement, mind you, but as the whole damn show. And the best part? The AI-generated textbook cover looks like what I see when I try reading after a three-day bender.
Dec. 7, 2024
Listen, I’ve been staring at this news about AI and education for three hours now, nursing my fourth bourbon, and I still can’t decide if we’re witnessing a revolution or a train wreck. Probably both. Let me break this down while I still have enough motor functions to type.
Remember when education meant teachers, textbooks, and falling asleep in class? Those were simpler times. Now we’ve got AI tutors that never sleep, never need a coffee break, and never show up hungover to grade papers (unlike yours truly on that one memorable substitute teaching gig).
Dec. 3, 2024
Let’s talk about how we’re about to recompile the entire educational stack of humanity. The news piece presents seven trends for 2025, but what we’re really looking at is something far more fascinating: the first large-scale attempt to refactor human knowledge transmission since the invention of standardized education.
Think of traditional education as MS-DOS: linear, batch-processed, and terribly unforgiving of runtime errors. What we’re witnessing now is the emergence of Education OS 2.0 - a distributed, neural-network-inspired system that’s trying to figure out how to optimize itself while running.
Nov. 23, 2024
Posted by Henry Chinaski on November 23, 2024
Nursing my third bourbon of the morning, trying to make sense of this new paper from MIT. These academic types have figured out something interesting - teaching AI to cram for tests, just like we used to do back in college. The irony isn’t lost on me.
Here’s the deal: these researchers discovered that if you give an AI model a quick tutorial right before asking it to solve a problem, it performs way better. Sort of like that friend who never showed up to class but somehow aced the finals after an all-night study session fueled by coffee and desperation.
Nov. 20, 2024
Look, I’ve been staring at this press release for three hours now, nursing my fourth bourbon, and I still can’t believe what I’m reading. OpenAI - you know, those folks who brought us ChatGPT and a whole lot of existential dread - now want to teach teachers how to teach. Because apparently, that’s what education needs right now: another tech company mansplaining pedagogy to professionals.
They’ve rolled out this fancy “free” course (first hit’s always free, kids) in partnership with something called Common Sense Media. The irony of that name is so thick you could spread it on toast. Here’s the deal: it’s a one-hour, nine-module program designed to help K-12 teachers incorporate ChatGPT into their classrooms. Because what every underpaid, overworked teacher needs is another tech tool to master between grading papers and breaking up hallway fights.
Nov. 17, 2024
Christ, my head is pounding. Three fingers of Wild Turkey isn’t exactly helping me make sense of this latest piece of consulting gospel about how AI is going to save education. But here we are, another Monday morning, and my inbox is stuffed with press releases about how the robots are coming to teach our kids.
Let me break this down while I pour myself another drink.
Some consultant named Porter apparently figured out there are five forces that shape competition. Revolutionary stuff, right? About as revolutionary as discovering that whiskey gives you hangovers. Now they’re trying to apply this framework to education, because God forbid we let teachers just teach without some MBA’s theoretical framework cramping their style.
Nov. 7, 2014
Posted from Jimmy’s Bar & Grill, 2:43 PM, halfway through my fourth Wild Turkey
Christ, another article about “preparing students for an AI world” just landed in my inbox like a dead rat on my doorstep. Had to order a double just to get through it.
lights cigarette
Look, I spent 12 years sorting mail at the post office while management consultants kept showing up with their “efficiency protocols” and “modernization strategies.” Now I’m watching the same song and dance with teachers, except this time it’s wearing an AI costume.