It’s 3 AM, and I’m nursing my fourth bourbon at O’Malley’s, watching some suit at the end of the bar try to convince his phone to order him a pizza. The phone keeps suggesting Thai food instead. Tomorrow’s headline, today: the machines aren’t just reading our minds anymore - they’re shopping our thoughts to the highest bidder.
Some eggheads at Cambridge (always Cambridge, isn’t it? Never someplace normal like Toledo) just dropped a paper warning us about something they’re calling the “intention economy.” Fancy way of saying we’re all about to get our brains window-shopped by AI.
Let me break this down while I pour another drink.
Remember when Facebook just wanted to keep you scrolling through cat videos and your ex’s vacation photos? Those were the good old days, kids. The “attention economy,” they called it. Now these digital fortune tellers want to graduate from stealing your time to picking your pocket before you even know you’re reaching for your wallet.
The whole thing works like this: AI systems are getting scary good at figuring out what you’re going to do before you do it. Not just the obvious stuff like knowing you’ll need hangover pills on Sunday morning (though I wish my AI would order those automatically). We’re talking about predicting - and manipulating - everything from what movie you’ll watch to who you’ll vote for.
And here’s where it gets really interesting, like finding out your favorite bartender’s been watering down your drinks all along. These AI systems? They’re learning to speak your language. Literally. They’re studying how you talk, what makes you tick, whether you fall for flattery or need a firm push. Then they’re selling that information to whoever’s got the cash.
Meta - because of course it’s fucking Meta - already built an AI that can beat humans at Diplomacy. If you’ve never played Diplomacy, imagine poker mixed with chess, except everyone’s lying and nobody’s friends afterward. The fact that AI can master this game should terrify anyone who’s ever tried to resist a late-night Amazon purchase.
The kicker? They’re not even trying to hide it anymore. Jensen Huang, the big cheese at Nvidia, is out there bragging about how their AI will “figure out your intention, your desire.” Funny how nobody asked if we wanted our desires figured out, but I guess consent is so 2020.
Dr. Jonnie Penn from Cambridge calls it a “gold rush for those who target, steer and sell human intentions.” I’ve seen gold rushes before. The only people who get rich are the ones selling the shovels. In this case, the shovels are AI models that can predict whether you’re more likely to buy a car if they show you an ad right after your coffee or right after your third martini.
Look, I’m not saying we’re completely screwed. But while you’re reading this, some AI somewhere is probably calculating the exact moment you’ll get tired of my rambling and click away. It’s probably right, too. That’s what scares me more than any hangover.
The real question isn’t whether this brave new world is coming - it’s already here, hiding behind those “personalized recommendations” and “tailored experiences.” The question is whether we’re going to let these digital fortune tellers turn our desires into commodities faster than I can empty this bottle of Buffalo Trace.
Maybe it’s time we all learned to be a little more unpredictable. Throw some static in the signal. Order that Thai food when the AI thinks you want pizza. Buy a typewriter. Read a paper book. Walk into a store without checking reviews first. Hell, maybe even talk to strangers in bars like we used to.
Or maybe I’m just drunk and paranoid. But remember: just because you’re paranoid doesn’t mean the AIs aren’t out to get you.
Time to close this laptop and order another round. At least for now, the bourbon doesn’t try to predict what I’m thinking. It just helps me forget.
Source: AI tools may soon manipulate people’s online decision-making, say researchers