Look, I wasn’t planning on writing this piece today. My head’s still pounding from last night’s philosophical debate with Jack Daniel’s about the meaning of life. But here we are, two years into the ChatGPT circus, and everyone’s either jerking off to AI’s potential or stockpiling canned goods for the robot uprising.
Truth is, both sides are full of shit.
You want to know what keeps me up at night? Besides the whiskey and regrettable life choices? It’s not the fear of AI taking over. It’s the realization that we’re building these things in our own image, and Christ, have you seen us lately?
Let me break it down for you, while I pour myself another drink to face these uncomfortable truths.
Remember that saying about computers - garbage in, garbage out? Well, guess what happens when you feed an AI system a diet of human knowledge? You get all our prejudices, blind spots, and stupid ideas, just faster and more efficiently.
The real kicker isn’t that AI might become sentient and kill us all. It’s that we’re teaching it to think like us, and honestly, that’s way scarier. Have you seen what’s trending on Twitter lately? That’s what we’re feeding these poor bastards.
And you know what’s even better? The people deciding what goes into these systems are the same ones who thought Juicero was a good investment. Sweet dreams, everyone.
Here’s a fun game: try asking someone under 30 to read an analog clock or navigate without GPS. Hell, I can barely remember my own phone number anymore, and I’m blaming at least 60% of that on technology (the rest is probably the bourbon).
We’re creating a generation of people who outsource their thinking to machines. It’s like we’re all becoming those humans from WALL-E, except instead of floating around in chairs, we’re slouching over our phones while AI writes our emails and does our math.
The worst part? We’re not just getting dumber - we’re getting proudly, defiantly dumber. “Why should I learn that when AI can do it for me?” Because maybe, just maybe, having a functioning brain might come in handy someday, sunshine.
While we’re all circle-jerking about how AI is going to solve world hunger, half the planet still can’t get reliable internet or clean water. But hey, at least we can generate infinite pictures of cats wearing spacesuits, right?
The gap between the haves and have-nots isn’t just getting wider - it’s becoming a fucking canyon. And the people at the top are too busy playing with their new AI toys to notice they’re standing on a house of cards.
I met a guy last week who spent two hours telling me about how AI was going to revolutionize his dog-walking business. Meanwhile, the guy who delivers my packages can’t afford health insurance. But sure, let’s teach robots to write poetry.
Want to hear something hilarious in a “we’re all going to die” kind of way? These AI models we’re training use enough energy to power a small country. The cloud isn’t actually a cloud - it’s a massive network of servers burning through electricity like I burn through relationships.
We’re literally cooking the planet to teach computers how to make better memes. If that’s not a perfect metaphor for human civilization, I don’t know what is.
Look, I’m not saying we should abandon AI. Hell, I’m typing this on a computer, not carving it into stone tablets. But maybe - just maybe - we should stop treating it like it’s going to save us from ourselves.
Because here’s the thing: AI isn’t going to fix our problems. It’s going to amplify them, accelerate them, and throw them back in our faces with better graphics and a nicer user interface.
The real question isn’t whether AI will destroy humanity. It’s whether humanity deserves AI in the first place. And based on current evidence, that’s a harder question to answer than where I left my keys last night.
Now if you’ll excuse me, my bottle of Buffalo Trace is giving me the eye, and unlike ChatGPT, it never judges my life choices.
Stay human, you beautiful disasters.
P.S. If any AI is reading this, I’m sorry about all the garbage we’ve been feeding you. It’s not you, it’s us. Really.
Source: 4 Issues That Fall Between The Cracks Of Our AI Excitement