From ChatGPT Kool-Aid to Agent Orange: The Next Big Nothing

Listen up, you beautiful disasters. It’s 3 AM, and I’ve just finished reading Marc Benioff’s latest sermon while nursing my fourth bourbon of the night. The gospel according to Saint Marc has spoken: ChatGPT was just Jesus juice, but now we’re all supposed to get high on “agents.”

Let me break this down for you through my whiskey-tinted glasses.

Remember last year when everyone was losing their minds over ChatGPT? Corporate suits were practically wet-dreaming about replacing their entire workforce with a chatbot that couldn’t tell its digital ass from its algorithmic elbow. Well, guess what? Benioff - yeah, that guy who runs Salesforce and probably hasn’t had to expense-report a drink since 1999 - just admitted what anyone with half a functioning liver could’ve told you: We all got drunk on the ChatGPT Kool-Aid.

And the hangover? It’s hitting harder than that time I tried to debug Python after a three-day bender.

But here’s where it gets rich. Instead of admitting that maybe, just maybe, AI isn’t the second coming of digital Jesus, they’re now pushing something called “agents.” What’s the difference, you ask? Well, according to the gospel, chatbots are like that clingy ex who needs constant attention, while agents are more like that friend who says they’ll help you move but actually gets the job done.

Salesforce just launched something called “Agentforce” - because apparently, adding “force” to anything makes it enterprise-grade. Microsoft’s not far behind with their “Copilot,” which sounds less like groundbreaking tech and more like something you’d hire when your regular pilot is too hammered to fly.

The funny part? Benioff’s out there calling out “AI priests and priestesses” for spreading false prophecies. That’s right - the same guy who’s been selling digital salvation since the cloud was just something that rained on your parade is now playing tech theologian. Takes one to know one, I suppose.

Here’s what really gets me though: Benioff admits we’re “hitting the upper limits of the LLMs.” Translation: this stuff isn’t getting much better, folks. It’s like when you hit that sweet spot at the bar - three drinks in, feeling good, but know that the fourth one might send you spiraling into bad karaoke territory.

And the real kicker? These corporate prophets are still trying to sell us on the idea that AI will “increase margins” and “augment employees.” Yeah, and I’m going to wake up tomorrow morning without a hangover and start a juice cleanse.

Look, I’m not saying AI is useless. It’s like having a really eager intern who occasionally hallucinates and can’t be trusted with the coffee run. But this constant pivot from one miracle solution to another is enough to drive anyone to drink. First, it was blockchain, then metaverse, then ChatGPT, and now “agents.” What’s next - AI shamans who can predict your quarterly earnings while reading your chakras?

The truth is, we’re still just scratching the surface of what AI can and can’t do. These tools are like that friend who claims they know everything about wine because they once took a weekend course at the community college. Sure, they might impress the uninitiated, but any seasoned drinker can spot the BS.

So here’s my advice, worth exactly what you’re paying for it: Don’t buy into the hype. Whether it’s chatbots, agents, or whatever they cook up next, remember that technology is just a tool. Like a good bottle of bourbon, it should enhance your life, not replace it.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, my glass is empty, and these profound thoughts aren’t going to drink themselves into existence.

Stay real, stay human, and don’t forget to tip your bartender, Henry Chinaski

P.S. If any AI agents are reading this, I still can’t get my printer to work. Figure that out, and then we’ll talk about autonomous problem-solving.

#TechCommentary #AIBullshit #BourbonThoughts #AgentsOfChaos

Source: Marc Benioff says AI’s future is all about agents, not chatbots